i just can't get enough of beautiful blooms and summer colours! LOVE summer. it is raining at the moment, but i'm just so happy that it's not even bothering me. i'm just a little bundle of happiness. and it feels good.
Thursday, December 16, 2010
beautiful blooms
i just can't get enough of beautiful blooms and summer colours! LOVE summer. it is raining at the moment, but i'm just so happy that it's not even bothering me. i'm just a little bundle of happiness. and it feels good.
not long now...
ok. so, my bad. i've been a bit slack on the old 'today was a good day because...' posts.
life just gets so busy sometimes, and Christmas time is definitely the worst (but in a good way).
i went to the doctor today, because i am SO OVER my insane hayfever...and it turns out i've got another sinus infection. oh joy. and that's why my sinus has been so extreme so far this season. but at least now i've got the drugs to make it better. and maybe it'll be all cleared up by the time the mister comes home! (which is only 6 more sleeps, did you know?!?!?)
but - today was a good day still because i managed to get all the Christmas presents, for the kids at work to take home, practically finished today! and they look super awesome, i'm really stoked with how they turned out. everyone has worked really well together to get them done, and i took the photos and got them printed today, so they are now complete. yay!!!
tomorrow is going to be a busy day - photos with amber in the morning (getting her portfolio ready for her new company)...then getting things sorted for The Little Big Markets on Saturday! I really really REALLY hope the rain stays away for saturday. Kylie (from ReallyReally Design) and I have been preparing for this for a couple of weeks now, and we are all ready and totally pumped for it. If you are free this Saturday (from 9am until 2pm) then totally come and check us out! little bit nervous, but it should be a bit of fun...and a good way to get my stuff known i guess.
then tomorrow night is our staff work do....should be a laugh - we're having it at Cobb'n'Co! old school or what?!?!
anyway. i am SUPER DOOPER excited that it is only 6 more sleeps until the mister is home. i'm about to go to bed now and when i wake up it will only be 5!!!!! can't wait til he is home. i know he is working really hard and deserves a nice summer holiday. we have so much planned for the next 3 months! there is so much stuff to look forward to! (which, of course, makes me very happy)
life is good right now. very good. and i really get a sense that things are only going to get better.
yay!
life just gets so busy sometimes, and Christmas time is definitely the worst (but in a good way).
i went to the doctor today, because i am SO OVER my insane hayfever...and it turns out i've got another sinus infection. oh joy. and that's why my sinus has been so extreme so far this season. but at least now i've got the drugs to make it better. and maybe it'll be all cleared up by the time the mister comes home! (which is only 6 more sleeps, did you know?!?!?)
but - today was a good day still because i managed to get all the Christmas presents, for the kids at work to take home, practically finished today! and they look super awesome, i'm really stoked with how they turned out. everyone has worked really well together to get them done, and i took the photos and got them printed today, so they are now complete. yay!!!
tomorrow is going to be a busy day - photos with amber in the morning (getting her portfolio ready for her new company)...then getting things sorted for The Little Big Markets on Saturday! I really really REALLY hope the rain stays away for saturday. Kylie (from ReallyReally Design) and I have been preparing for this for a couple of weeks now, and we are all ready and totally pumped for it. If you are free this Saturday (from 9am until 2pm) then totally come and check us out! little bit nervous, but it should be a bit of fun...and a good way to get my stuff known i guess.
then tomorrow night is our staff work do....should be a laugh - we're having it at Cobb'n'Co! old school or what?!?!
anyway. i am SUPER DOOPER excited that it is only 6 more sleeps until the mister is home. i'm about to go to bed now and when i wake up it will only be 5!!!!! can't wait til he is home. i know he is working really hard and deserves a nice summer holiday. we have so much planned for the next 3 months! there is so much stuff to look forward to! (which, of course, makes me very happy)
life is good right now. very good. and i really get a sense that things are only going to get better.
yay!
Saturday, December 11, 2010
photo blog
well, lately i've been having a great time snapping all the beauty around. summer is here! and the colours are vibrant and delicious. i can't get enough of it!
here are a few of my latest shots....
here are a few of my latest shots....
Pohutukawa glory
flowers in bloom
the glorious greens at linds and dan's wedding ceremony....
looking upwards
next canvas...
thought i would share the 2nd canvas now that it has dried.
simple. but i quite love it.
simple. but i quite love it.
Friday, December 10, 2010
getting creative....
i've been enjoying a return to my creative side in the last few days....
for some reason, i've just had the urge to get crafty.
after lindsay and dan's wedding, i had a couple of the bits of material they had used for napkins at the reception...so i've used them in my creations...
here's the 1st one...the 2nd one is still drying :)
what do you think?
p.s. i forgot to to the whole "today was a good day" thing yesterday....
i can't really remember the last couple of days enough to write about them.
but today was definitely a good day because i went for a facial this morning before work and it was
BLISS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
my Sammy is amazing and my skin now looks and feels delicious!!!!!
for some reason, i've just had the urge to get crafty.
after lindsay and dan's wedding, i had a couple of the bits of material they had used for napkins at the reception...so i've used them in my creations...
here's the 1st one...the 2nd one is still drying :)
what do you think?
p.s. i forgot to to the whole "today was a good day" thing yesterday....
i can't really remember the last couple of days enough to write about them.
but today was definitely a good day because i went for a facial this morning before work and it was
BLISS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
my Sammy is amazing and my skin now looks and feels delicious!!!!!
Tuesday, December 7, 2010
what it means to me....
depression can mean different things to different people.
to me, depression is an evil. a killer.
it kills hope. love. beauty. laughter. joy. faith. and vision.
all things that are vital to a healthy and successful life.
depression kills your ability to trust.
in yourself. in others. in the world.
depression kills relationships.
even the ones you thought were the strongest.
depression kills humour.
things you once found hilarious don't seem so funny any more.
depression kills understanding.
it seems you become lost in translation. even with those you are closest to.
have you ever had a moment in time where you feel like you are screaming at the top of your lungs, in a crowded room, and no-one even stops to look up at you?
or a moment when you feel like you're buried alive, and you're banging on the coffin, but the people keep on shoveling the dirt on top of you?
or a moment when you are under water, scrambling for the sunlight at the surface, but an invisible force is holding your foot so you don't get anywhere?
or a moment, in a dream, where you are running away from a monster, but you are running on soft sand, against a strong wind so you can't run fast, and the monster is gaining on you?
to me, all of those moments are what having depression is like, for a major chunk of the time.
sometimes, the feelings just become so intense, you can't see an end to them. you can't find a solution. and sometimes, you can't even remember the reason for their existence.
all you know, in that moment, is that excruciatingly overwhelming sense of emotion - usually sadness or insecurity or doubt. there is nothing else. no voice of reason or truth or light.
just the voice of the killer, spreading its evil through your thoughts.
depression kills confidence.
to yourself, you are the least exciting person, with the least amount to offer.
depression kills control.
you no longer have control over your emotional reactions, and your interpretations become skewed.
there are times, in extreme cases, where depression kills life.
sometimes, the extremity of the emotions become too much.
sometimes, the light at the end of the tunnel is never reached.
for those people, i feel sadness.
it hurts me to think of the loneliness, emptiness, and hopelessness they must have felt during that dark moment when depression got the better of them.
that's why i find it so difficult when others talk about people who take their own lives as being 'selfish'.
i understand both sides of the argument, and agree, in part, with them both.
for the family and loved ones left behind, the hurt and pain of not knowing why, will never subside. the loss they feel, and possibly the guilt of not having known or being able to help, will live on with them.
having nearly been in a place of absolute darkness, i understand the desire to end the emotional overload. to end the feeling of failure. to end the feeling of sadness. to end the hurt and to quiet the evil voices in your head.
however, i'm not saying that i agree it is the right thing to do.
i am so thankful that i was pulled back from that place. i am so thankful that i am still here. even though, some days are hard and i wonder if it would've made that much of a difference to everyone else....
but i have hope again now. and i have joy.
yes, i still have sadness. and yes i still struggle with feelings of failure, inadequacy, and darkness.
but there is some light. and i intend to hold on to that light.
i know that there are people around me who would've missed me if i wasn't here. i know that, to them, i mean everything. and that makes the battle worth it.
i am thankful that i never completely lost the fight.
for me, from now on, depression is a LOSER.
you've already lost the battle, big D. I am still here. and i am still smiling.
i still see beauty in the world, and i still find joy.
what's even better, i am still learning so much about myself.
every day brings new enlightenment.
new enlightenment brings new empowerment.
one day, i am sure, i will be triumphant. i will be the WINNER.
i can't wait for that day.
i'm going to have the biggest, most funnest party ever!!!!
p.s. you're all invited :)
to me, depression is an evil. a killer.
it kills hope. love. beauty. laughter. joy. faith. and vision.
all things that are vital to a healthy and successful life.
depression kills your ability to trust.
in yourself. in others. in the world.
depression kills relationships.
even the ones you thought were the strongest.
depression kills humour.
things you once found hilarious don't seem so funny any more.
depression kills understanding.
it seems you become lost in translation. even with those you are closest to.
have you ever had a moment in time where you feel like you are screaming at the top of your lungs, in a crowded room, and no-one even stops to look up at you?
or a moment when you feel like you're buried alive, and you're banging on the coffin, but the people keep on shoveling the dirt on top of you?
or a moment when you are under water, scrambling for the sunlight at the surface, but an invisible force is holding your foot so you don't get anywhere?
or a moment, in a dream, where you are running away from a monster, but you are running on soft sand, against a strong wind so you can't run fast, and the monster is gaining on you?
to me, all of those moments are what having depression is like, for a major chunk of the time.
sometimes, the feelings just become so intense, you can't see an end to them. you can't find a solution. and sometimes, you can't even remember the reason for their existence.
all you know, in that moment, is that excruciatingly overwhelming sense of emotion - usually sadness or insecurity or doubt. there is nothing else. no voice of reason or truth or light.
just the voice of the killer, spreading its evil through your thoughts.
depression kills confidence.
to yourself, you are the least exciting person, with the least amount to offer.
depression kills control.
you no longer have control over your emotional reactions, and your interpretations become skewed.
there are times, in extreme cases, where depression kills life.
sometimes, the extremity of the emotions become too much.
sometimes, the light at the end of the tunnel is never reached.
for those people, i feel sadness.
it hurts me to think of the loneliness, emptiness, and hopelessness they must have felt during that dark moment when depression got the better of them.
that's why i find it so difficult when others talk about people who take their own lives as being 'selfish'.
i understand both sides of the argument, and agree, in part, with them both.
for the family and loved ones left behind, the hurt and pain of not knowing why, will never subside. the loss they feel, and possibly the guilt of not having known or being able to help, will live on with them.
having nearly been in a place of absolute darkness, i understand the desire to end the emotional overload. to end the feeling of failure. to end the feeling of sadness. to end the hurt and to quiet the evil voices in your head.
however, i'm not saying that i agree it is the right thing to do.
i am so thankful that i was pulled back from that place. i am so thankful that i am still here. even though, some days are hard and i wonder if it would've made that much of a difference to everyone else....
but i have hope again now. and i have joy.
yes, i still have sadness. and yes i still struggle with feelings of failure, inadequacy, and darkness.
but there is some light. and i intend to hold on to that light.
i know that there are people around me who would've missed me if i wasn't here. i know that, to them, i mean everything. and that makes the battle worth it.
i am thankful that i never completely lost the fight.
for me, from now on, depression is a LOSER.
you've already lost the battle, big D. I am still here. and i am still smiling.
i still see beauty in the world, and i still find joy.
what's even better, i am still learning so much about myself.
every day brings new enlightenment.
new enlightenment brings new empowerment.
one day, i am sure, i will be triumphant. i will be the WINNER.
i can't wait for that day.
i'm going to have the biggest, most funnest party ever!!!!
p.s. you're all invited :)
dress-ups
part of what i love about my job is that i get to dress up all the time and it's actually okay! all throughout the year, i enjoy different themed dress-up days - teaching the kids their colours (having a whole day dedicated to a different colour each time), animals, bugs, insects, favourite stories, etc, etc.
today, was our ultimate dress-up day. we had our Christmas pageant, and i was the all-important pig in the stable. yep. it's a tough job - but someone's got to do it!
the pageant went really well, all the parents loved it, the children were super cute in their little outfits - angels, shepherds, sheep, cows and pigs.
so, that's why my day was good today. i won't mention about the stuff i used to make my face look pink....haha oops. was hard to get off again!
another thing (that may seem little, but is actually HUGE) was that Linds, Dan and Jon & Hil (Linds' parents) LOVED the pics i took at the wedding yesterday! stoked! it's always great to get good feedback!
and one more thing. i only have 15 more sleeps until the mister is back! far out! that's not long at all! yay :)
nite all. i'm off to sleep, hopefully.
today, was our ultimate dress-up day. we had our Christmas pageant, and i was the all-important pig in the stable. yep. it's a tough job - but someone's got to do it!
the pageant went really well, all the parents loved it, the children were super cute in their little outfits - angels, shepherds, sheep, cows and pigs.
so, that's why my day was good today. i won't mention about the stuff i used to make my face look pink....haha oops. was hard to get off again!
another thing (that may seem little, but is actually HUGE) was that Linds, Dan and Jon & Hil (Linds' parents) LOVED the pics i took at the wedding yesterday! stoked! it's always great to get good feedback!
and one more thing. i only have 15 more sleeps until the mister is back! far out! that's not long at all! yay :)
nite all. i'm off to sleep, hopefully.
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